What a Life!

I hate Thursdays! They are always an absolute disaster no matter what I do.

Ben loves music so I’ve enrolled him in Music Together classes, which he loves. They are Thursday morning at 10:00 a.m. They used to be at 10:30, which was more manageable for us, but then the last two sessions have been at 10:00 because some parent needed them moved back or they couldn’t make it due to a conflict. (Perhaps their lives are overscheduled – just a thought.)

Anyway, my being somewhere by 10:00 in the morning is an absolute nightmare. I know that sounds really lame, because when I worked I had to be somewhere much earlier than that. But I’m a SAHM now, and like I said, being somewhere like 10:00 is an absolute nightmare.

I’m a morning person. If you want to ask me a favor, the earlier in the day that you ask, the more likely you are to get a yes. I get up early and by noon I am out of steam and no longer in take-initiative mode. I do my best thinking in the morning because I am full of energy and optimism. At night, I know that you are supposed to think about the next day and plan your day, but I can never do that because I’m too tired to be excited about anything and thinking about what I need to do just makes me depressed so I end up crying and going to bed. Seriously. I am not a night person. But first thing in the morning, I can plan a great day and make a fabulous list of all the grand things I am going to accomplish.

If we have to leave the house by 10:00, I have to cut my routine short and spend my most “fertile” time of day going to town. Leaving for town at 11:00 works much better for us because by then I’m starting to run out of steam but I still have enough energy to run a few errands with a toddler in tow.

Furthermore, if we leave for town at 11:00, we get back around 1:00 and Ben falls asleep on the way home and takes a good nap. If we leave for town earlier, we either get home too early for him to fall asleep on the way home or he takes cat-naps while we’re driving around and basically he ends up not taking a nap. When he gets his nap, he sleeps through the night. When he doesn’t take a nap, he gets up three times and wants to nurse.

So basically our going to town for a 10:00 music class just creates 24 hours of hell. He’s grumpy because he hasn’t had his nap. I’m grumpy because I haven’t accomplished anything and I haven’t gotten my afternoon break while he takes a nap. Then we don’t sleep well and it’s just a complete disaster.

There are ten classes in each session. This morning’s class is the fourth one we will have missed. I feel guilty for not going. Ben loves those classes and I feel like a horrible mother to not get him there. But I also feel like a horrible mother if I take him because of how the rest of our day goes. So when we don’t make it to class (as is the case today), it’s because by 9:30 I can tell we aren’t going to make it so I am walking around the house in tears having my own meltdown.

I hate Thursdays!

Today was the last week of this session. The instructor was late on week so he said he would add on an extra class, which would be next week. I’m thinking I might “forget” about it. I just cannot handle another Thursday like this.

Supposedly beginning with the next session, they will offer more classes at different times. The 10:00 class happens to be the only daytime class, and evenings don’t work for us. I don’t know when the next session starts – probably some time in July. It’s the summer session so it will only last six weeks instead of ten. I would really like for Ben to go, but I can only manage it if it’s at a reasonable hour.

I know I sound like a wimp. I’m a SAHM so I have all the time in the world, right? During the school year, we have storytime at the library on Tuesdays (at 11:15). Then we have Music Together class on Thursdays, and play group on Friday mornings. It’s not like our life is overly scheduled. I should be able to do this. But I can’t. I just hate Thursday’s because it’s a nightmare if we make it to class, and it’s a nightmare if we don’t.